Gratitude for Merely Being – Deconstructing Your self

Gratitude for Merely Being – Deconstructing Your self

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Meditation

We’re going to start tonight by merely checking in with what’s it prefer to be you proper now. So, simply ask your self the query, what’s it prefer to be me proper now? Then, merely look. How’s your physique really feel? What’s it prefer to be that physique proper now? How’s your emotional world doing? Really feel into that. How’s your psychological life doing? Really feel into that, and, to no matter extent it’s current for you, how’s your life doing proper now? We’re, in a really direct method, simply tuning into our present expertise, seeing it clearly, after which letting go of any want to alter it. Letting go of aggression in the direction of it and the concept that we wish to make it totally different or higher or one thing.  As a substitute, simply merely letting it’s what it’s. Let’s simply tune into that for some time collectively, simply noticing the way you’re doing, and letting that be simply high quality.

Good. Now, with out altering something in any respect, or doing something, simply tune into the already there wakefulness that’s current. The straightforward consciousness that’s there, whether or not you do something or not. Simply tune into that, setting apart, in the intervening time, partaking from the equipment of the thoughts, and as an alternative, simply noticing straight the straightforward consciousness that’s all the time current. In the event you’re questioning, “Effectively, how do I do this?” Effectively, that’s asking, how have you learnt something is going on? Nevertheless you already know something’s taking place, that’s easy consciousness itself. There it’s. It’s that straightforward. There’s nothing to do to make it conscious. It’s already conscious. You may’t make it extra conscious. It’s already all the best way conscious, however there are some issues we will discover about it. 

Once more, with out actually doing very a lot or altering it in any method, initially we will discover that it’s very spacious. If consciousness is at present actually engaged with the equipment of the thoughts, it is going to are usually relatively non-spacious. Once we set that apart, permitting the ideas and planning and evaluation to maintain going if they need, however we’re probably not concerned in it or engaged with it. Once we set that apart, we discover that the wakefulness itself, the notice itself, is already very broad, very vast open. You may hear sounds from behind you and in entrance of you and above you and beneath. You may hear sounds in all instructions. It’s already vast open. Mild is observed from all instructions, emotions are coming from all instructions. It’s broad, it’s vast open–we don’t should make it vast open. Simply discover that it’s already there, already spacious, and form of panoramic. You may’t actually “do” spacious and panoramic. In the event you attempt to come from the equipment of the thoughts and make it occur–I’m gonna open it this manner and unfold it that method–that’s nonetheless a lot smaller and tighter than if we simply step again and simply let it do its factor, which is of course vast open. There generally is a actual urge generally to attempt to open it up. As a substitute, simply step again. It’s already vast open with out doing something in any respect. Relaxation on this wakeful vast openness.

One other actually attention-grabbing high quality of this wakefulness is that it has quite a lot of vitality. It’s wakeful. It’s very energized. A method we will play with that a bit of bit that’s attention-grabbing is simply to breathe that vitality straight into your decrease stomach. You don’t change your breath in any respect, actually, however with every in-breath, you simply really feel the vitality gathering in your decrease stomach. If you wish to, you may see it coming straight in.   There’s a gap in your stomach and it comes straight in, or you may breathe it down if you need. With every in-breath really feel that vitality gathering within the decrease stomach and simply really feel how that’s clearly energizing to the system, to the physique and thoughts. In a method, paradoxically, it’s additionally very grounding. Let’s simply breathe into our decrease stomach for some time right here from this very spacious place. We’re probably not concentrating. We’ve bought this already present very spacious, vast awakeness, and we’re simply calmly noticing that we will enable this vitality to collect in our decrease stomach, beneath your stomach button.

On the out-breath, you may really feel it. It is a feeling that radiates out from that spot form of magnetically, so to talk–a sense of grounding and in addition energizing. Once more, with out attempting to govern it, or management it, or transfer it round, you would possibly really feel the vitality radiating out from that decrease stomach into your extremities, into the remainder of the physique, into the top, and so forth. This tends to make the physique extra relaxed and in that leisure, in that actual nice letting go, we discover quite a lot of stillness.  

Possibly you’re having a extremely totally different expertise than what I’m describing–and that’s okay. I’m simply pointing to some issues that you simply would possibly discover. 

Now, let’s transfer up, doing the identical means of respiratory right into a spot, however now we’re respiratory into our coronary heart. From this very grounded place of the decrease stomach and sustaining a form of robust footing in vast openness, simply breathe into the center on the in-breath. Feeling the center opening up, energizing and unfolding, a flower opening up. On the out-breath it radiates out heat; it radiates out a way of being balanced; it radiates out kindness; it radiates out connection. We’re respiratory out and in of the center, and actually noticing how that feels within the physique, the way it feels energetically.

Generally that place can really feel a bit of blocked or shut down, however that’s okay. Simply let it’s the best way it’s, and spot that as we breathe out and in of the center heart, it tends to heat up. It tends to melt like butter, tends to naturally open a bit of bit, with out us forcing something or imagining it must be totally different. It simply form of relaxes open, a minimum of a bit of bit. Discover how, as the center warms and softens and opens, how that feels in the remainder of the physique because it radiates outward, as these sensations radiate outwards.

Good. Now let’s transfer as much as the third eye, the brow. Inhaling there straight by way of a gap within the heart of your brow. Inhaling and respiratory out. Permitting the eyes to actually chill out, the face to actually chill out. Getting some sense of this clear shiny knowledge vitality constructing within the third eye heart on the in-breath after which radiating outward on the out-breath. An actual sense of readability and lucid notion of seeing issues as they really are. As we breathe straight into this brow heart, energized with this knowledge and readability, the equipment of thought simply falls aside, and we simply discover shiny clear vast open awakeness within the thoughts. Then radiating out into the physique.

Good. Discover, as we breathe into this house, and really feel into that house, contained in the breath, contained in the vitality within the brow is simply extra space. It’s simply vast open in there. We are able to really feel that there’s simply large boundless openness proper within the head. It’s nearly as if there’s no head. If we let go of imagining our head–let go of imagining the construction, and as an alternative simply really feel. What we really feel is vast open spaciousness contained in the vitality. It’s very onerous for any specific ideas to seize ahold inside that tremendously vast open energized house. It’s simply so relaxed and so open, and so free. It’s probably not motivated in any respect to seize on to any thought, which collapses it down.

Simply constantly letting go into vast openness, after which respiratory this vast openness straight down into the center, which is already heat and open. Now we discover within the heart of that energized heat, sort, coronary heart, is boundless house. The whole lot else is a psychological image of the center.  If we let go of, or don’t have interaction with, that psychological image, what we really feel is vast openness, large freedom and spaciousness within the coronary heart. There are physique sensations there however they’re not confining. Discover that the huge openness within the head is connecting straight with an unlimited openness within the coronary heart. In a method it’s nearly like a tube or cylinder of huge house connecting the 2.

Good. Now we drop down, with this vast open, huge spaciousness, into the decrease stomach, noticing that, in that basically energized, grounded spot, there’s simply vast openness–the sky–and that that’s linked to the sky-like high quality of the center and the sky-like high quality of the thoughts or the top. Feeling how awake and clear and shiny that’s, and on the identical time, it’s merely vast open, very free, grounded, and relaxed. 

We are able to breathe in straight by way of the highest of the top, down by way of the brow heart, by way of the center heart, into the stomach heart. It’s only one large open house. Then breathe again out, up that vast open channel. Despite the fact that we will nonetheless really feel the physique sensations, it’s as if your entire physique is simply fully clear or completely boundless, completely with out boundary–only a stream of vitality in house.

Wherever something’s sticking, simply let the house and vitality open that up, with none effort. It’s completely easy. It does it itself. Wherever there’s any constriction, or crimping, or crunching, or tightening in any respect, simply let the vitality in house simply launch it. Anytime the thoughts hooks onto something, simply let the spaciousness simply dissolve the hooks, with none effort, with none doing in your half in any respect. It simply comes again into relaxed openness, vast awakeness, easy pure readability and ease.

Good. Now, if there’s any remaining sense that you simply’re making a visualization or attempting to think about one thing if any of that’s occurring simply drop all that. Any remnant of that form of creativeness, simply completely drop it, and spot that the spaciousness and the convenience and the readability remains to be there. It’s all the time been there. We’re simply letting it shine forth of its personal accord, with out distracting. Totally letting go of doing something in any respect. Simply relaxation as open presence. There’s no option to “do” open presence. In the event you’re attempting to make it occur, that’s a lifeless finish. You need to simply let go of attempting. What’s left is open presence, readability, ease and spaciousness, with none doing in any respect. 

If the thoughts contracts right into a stream of thought or a fantasy, simply discover that inside that’s large spaciousness. It’s already awake, it’s already shiny and clear and spacious, inside even that. Being caught up in a distraction is a form of doing, and all we actually must do is let go of that doing. Simply come again to relaxation, and we’re not distracted. We’re again in readability and presence and ease. All of the makes an attempt of the equipment of the thoughts simply take us away from this. There’s no method to do that. You need to simply not do. 

Generally individuals make an enormous doing out of not doing. That is simply not doing. Very merely, what occurs is that the spaciousness is current, the convenience is there, the readability, the stillness, openness. It’s simply all proper there the minute we’re not distracting away from it with a bunch of doing. The surefire signal that you simply’re distracted or caught up in one thing is that you simply’ll really feel the house contract. As quickly because the house contracts, simply chill out, simply let go, simply cease doing, and the naturally, all the time present openness of the house will reveal itself.

In the event you sit like this for some time, you discover one thing actually odd. You would possibly discover one thing actually uncommon, and that’s that as an alternative of feeling that you simply’re sitting there doing a meditation, it is going to really feel much more like huge house and readability and ease is manifesting a thoughts and a physique. You may really feel the physique, and there are ideas, and the thoughts, and there are emotions, and all that, however they’re form of an expression of this open, clear, wakeful house. They’re nearly showing in it, fabricated from it. In order that, as an alternative of being an individual doing a meditation and tuning into some form of consciousness, consciousness is vibrating into being a physique and a thoughts that simply does stuff. This physique and thoughts that seems inside and out of consciousness is a joyous expression of openness. It’s a ravishing and noble manifestation from the very fountain of utter creativity, being recreated time and again, second by second, into pure presence, pure magnificence.

Moreover, you might discover that this expression of house as physique and thoughts doesn’t cease there. It radiates outward. This joyous expression of magnificence and profundity radiates outward touching all different expressions, and all these different expressions radiate again to you. So at the same time as this wakefulness, this vast open readability and presence, bubbles forth right into a physique and a thoughts and an individual, that effervescent forth can look again at its personal supply and simply say thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks.

Okay, superb. Let’s let go of the formal meditation there, though, in fact, the meditation can hold going, because the wakeful house is all the time current. 

Let’s simply hop proper in with any feedback, experiences, questions, issues that you simply don’t perceive that you simply wish to direct at me, or stuff you wish to say occurred.

Questioner 1: I’m simply curious in the event you might converse to when your thoughts is especially chatty, however you’re probably not clinging to the ideas. Generally I’ll go down the rabbit gap, which is the extra regular expertise. However generally my thoughts is speaking speaking speaking and it’s simply bouncing, and I’m probably not holding on to the ideas. Might you converse to that?

Michael: It’s an attention-grabbing factor. One of the crucial frequent misconceptions is that we should cease pondering, or that if meditation is working, your ideas should cease. Some meditations do this, however on this method of working we’re not. Keep in mind, the very very first thing I stated is we’re letting go of the aggression in the direction of the self. Meaning we really feel we now have to alter what’s occurring. We’re letting go of that: we don’t should make the thoughts do that, or the thoughts do this. Some meditations are doing that, however on this method, if it desires to speak, it could possibly discuss discuss discuss discuss discuss discuss, however we’re simply probably not being attentive to it. It’s like, okay, you go over there and discuss, we’re going to relaxation as awake presence. 

The discuss doesn’t get in the best way so long as you’re not grabbing onto it, hooked up to it, sure up in it. So generally I name that pondering factor the equipment of the thoughts. You may simply set that down and it could possibly sit there and nonetheless do its factor. It’s not getting in the best way of something. It solely will get in the best way in the event you can’t let go. In the event you hold grabbing onto each thought, then you definitely’re doing the previous tennis shoe-in-the-dryer factor. 

All of the spaciousness visualization helps to let that go, and once more, letting go, that means, actually, simply let it run if it desires to run. We don’t should cease it, we don’t have to manage it, we don’t should make it this or that thought. We simply let it do its factor. It’s a really hands-off form of method. We’re not getting in there and manipulating and controlling.  

Suzuki Roshi of the San Francisco Zen Middle used to say, in the event you’re a farmer with cows, and also you fence within the cows, the cows will break down the fence or leap over it. The true option to include them is to offer them a area so giant they’ll by no means discover the sting of it. That’s the thought. Working that method, what you begin to discover, is that to actually be concerned in pondering is an exercise. You need to seize on, and that could be a form of rigidity. In the event you study to acknowledge that second of cramping, it’s very easy to only not cramp. It’s an actual bodily taste–you may really feel it.  It won’t be bodily, nevertheless it’s a sense, so in the event you study to acknowledge, “oh, I’m grabbing proper there”, you simply don’t. 

Loosen up, after which the ideas will run, or not, however you’re free, you’re simply vast open. We’ve got a psychological mannequin that we’re on the mercy of our ideas they usually form of “have us,” however actually, you don’t should seize on. They could be looping, however you don’t have to hold on and go for the experience. It’s an actual open method of working.

Questioner 1: Nice, thanks.

Michael:  Yep.

Questioner 2: Hello. I needed to ask about posture.

Michael: Certain, sit up.

Questioner 2: Okay, again ache will come and go, so ought to I simply proceed attempting to sit up and strengthen my backbone?

Michael: It’s a tough one, as a result of perhaps your core could be weak, so it’s only a matter of getting used to having these muscle groups engaged. However, additionally we will do a factor;  If I say sit up–everyone sit up–and simply concentrate whilst you do this. You would possibly discover that you simply get actually tense in a sure method whenever you do this. Is it potential to discover a spot the place you’re upright, nevertheless it’s not tense? Generally we do this as an train.  You sit up and form of transfer round, not in an train method, however in an exploration method, the place it’s balanced, the place is it upright, however there’s nearly no muscle rigidity. Possibly you’ve bought some form of structural rigidity occurring, however as you play with that an increasing number of over time, it begins to launch these structural tensions, and also you’ll discover that you would be able to simply sit upright for a extremely very long time, as a result of there’s nearly no effort concerned. You’ve bought a extremely good balanced spot. 

Once we’re sitting actually actually nonetheless, it’s bought to be probably the most relaxed stillness–it’s by no means tight stillness.  It’s simply actually relaxed. While you discover actual ease and spaciousness, the physique simply turns into very very comfortable, and really open, and really nonetheless, and it feels good to be upright, as a result of the breath is so open, it’s so awake. So we’re discovering this place that’s tremendous relaxed and but actually awake and upright. In the event you’re attempting to be form of navy upright–improper path. It’s a really relaxed and balanced upright. It’s tensegrity or one thing.

Questioner 2: Okay, thanks.

Questioner 3: I’ve this type of psychological course of the place a few of my expertise, perhaps it’s rigidity…

Michael: Don’t combat the stress, then that’s double rigidity. I discover some rigidity right here and I bought to assault it make it go away you already know and so I’m gonna make these fingers chill out–that’s precisely not what we’re doing, proper? That’s aggression:  “I’m going to alter it,” and it’s an actual behavior in our tradition. We’re going to take that forest and make it a mall, whether or not it likes it or not. We’re not doing that, it’s extra, okay there’s some rigidity there, can I discover the spaciousness and ease inside it, even when it’s nonetheless tense? There’s already spaciousness and ease inside it, so we simply form of discover that, and chill out round it, chill out in the direction of it, and also you’ll discover it begins to get softened already, simply by eradicating our aggression in the direction of it. Little by little, we’re simply permitting, permitting, permitting, and if I’m permitting, it will begin to open, nevertheless it additionally would possibly take some time. Simply to be actually clear, whereas I’m sitting I’m not attempting to pressure something.

Questioner 3: I really feel I’ve a course of that goes round on the lookout for tenseness after which I’m “oh, that course of form of is a rigidity.” 

Michael: It’s its personal doing doing doing doing; so simply let go.

Questioner 3: … after which I’ll be misplaced in thought.

Michael:  That’s a rigidity, too, proper? So it takes quite a lot of rigidity to be misplaced in thought. You’ll discover, in the event you chill out that exact rigidity, your thoughts goes open and really current. Then it’ll snap shut once more, then simply chill out once more, and over time the form of behavior of rigidity within the thoughts will simply begin to ease. It gained’t be such a powerful behavior, after which ease some extra. So at first once I say “your thoughts is simply naturally open,” most individuals are, “no, it’s simply sitting there, closed.” However did you ever see somebody who’s been sitting in a chair just about all day lengthy for lots of years? They’ve a tough time. Their physique’s actual stiff. Our thoughts may be form of stiff if it’s used to being tight, however you’ll discover even inside that, there’s spaciousness and ease, even inside that rigidity. We hold coming again to that and even that form of recurring tightness will soften. Particularly with the form of respiratory into it and stuff that we’re doing. That basically permits it to get supple, removes the inventory rigidity fairly shortly, okay?

Questioner 4: There was a degree throughout the meditation once we had been coming right down to the center, as we had been taking place, I felt overwhelmed, however that feeling of being overwhelmed was within the thoughts, it wasn’t within the coronary heart, it wasn’t nervousness. 

Michael:  Proper, and it wasn’t in your stomach both, proper?

Questioner 3:  Precisely, not in my stomach. It was in my thoughts, however there was no affiliation with the actual thought, and that made me wish to disconnect nearly as a result of I felt as if it’s simply too overwhelming, I simply must take a step again. Is that frequent in meditation? That is my first guided meditation.

Michael:  Certain, positive, that may be fairly frequent though you’ve got an unusual stage of readability about it, in order that’s good. You need to use the stomach and the center as a useful resource as a result of they’re not overwhelmed. So as an alternative of “Oh, I’ve bought to go away the meditation, I’ve bought to get out of this,” you simply hold feeling that groundedness and kindness and ease within the stomach and the center, and the sensation of overwhelm will soften and ease and go away. Basically it’ll relax. 

Lots of instances the thoughts is just not used to not being caught up in thought, and it’s “whoa, the place’s the bottom, as a result of I’m used to being tight contained in the equipment, and if I if I’m not in my cage, the place am I?” So it’s the overwhelm of freedom–you get used to it, after which it gained’t freak you out anymore, okay?

Questioner 3: Thanks.

Questioner 4: I observed with the actual wordage of letting it go or releasing it, I observed my thoughts’s recurring tendency to see that as rejecting it or avoiding it. For instance, with the posture, I discover each time that I come and sit on this specific type of mat, I might have chosen the chair however I didn’t actually have a alternative.

Michael:  You may all the time ask for an additional chair, we now have plenty of them, so be happy, okay?

Questioner 4:  Good. I’ll do this subsequent time, as a result of I observed that quite a lot of ache arose in my physique and what was rising was this a part of me that was feeling riot of, “how dare you inflict ache on me within the identify of freedom, or one thing.” I’m interested by your ideas on that.

Michael:  There’s lots to say about that, however I might say, subsequent time, sit in a chair and don’t simply sit in ache. In the event you should transfer, transfer. Don’t simply sit there letting that be inflicted upon you. Much more deeply, outdoors the meditation, there’s loads of ache that’s going to be inflicted on you by life, proper? Most cancers ache, and stuff that you would be able to’t do something about that’s inflicted upon you. So is your response to that simply going to be, “how dare you?”? It could be for some time, proper? Possibly for a very long time, and that’s a very good response. 

However, finally, it’s nonetheless taking place; ache of being previous, ache of adverse stuff taking place in life, ache of associates dying, ache of relationships falling aside, ache of kids transferring away, ache of all of the stuff that occurs. All of it will get inflicted upon us, and that’s not some form of mistake of some sort. It’s tragic, however in one other mind-set about it, it’s simply life. So we now have to study to sit down with that, too. That’s why generally on goal we do–we didn’t tonight–however generally we actually work with the ache that comes up in meditation, both emotionally or bodily, for that very motive: as a result of within the deep finish of the pool, that’s the stuff that meditation is actually instructing us to work with; as a result of rebelling in opposition to it doesn’t get you wherever. It simply wears you out. The stuff that may’t be modified. Posture we will change, however there’s stuff we will’t change, and that’s why this isn’t simply “let’s all drift away on a cloud of nice fantasy,” we’re actually studying to work with the ache that life brings. 

In order that query is vital, and it’s what our apply teaches you. If yow will discover spaciousness even in ache which is unquestionably there, you begin to perceive how one can work with this. So once more, all the time, if you’ll want to transfer to not be in ache, do this, however generally there could be different smaller pains that aren’t fairly so overwhelming, that you simply select to work with and start to note that they, too, are spacious and free and current. This goes in an attention-grabbing path, a extremely highly effective path. So it’s a basic query.

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